caterpillars, cocoons & butterflies
February 9, 2010 at 00:01 · Filed under 7/ Diary of a Luna.............tic and tagged: life, writing, thought, loss, uncertainty, hope, reality, street, wisdom, ghetto, man, holla
every
Man
digs
his
own
Grave
and
whatever
Situation
a
Man
is
in
that’s
down
to
His
Own
Actions
but bare love to everyone and if anyone’s got something to say you got my number holla me…
February 8, 2010 at 23:33 · Filed under 6/ Black Sunset (2010) and tagged: bunny, confused, dead, feeling, hurt, insanity, lies, love, lunatic, madness, poetry, reality, sadness, soul destroying, thought, uncertainty, unlove, writing
i feel so guilty
but it was you
that did me so
wrong
everyone says
what goes around
comes around
but there is still
a place in my heart
that no one else
will occupy
but you
i feel like a snitch
traitor grass
telling them
secrets that
have been kept
for so long
as i’m not strong
enough to
deny the truth
i wish i could
save you now
i am helping
the nails
penetrate and
break your
weak but strong
mahogany heart
i can see your eyes
like a rabbit in
headlights
wide with fear
twinkle of light
extinguished
in dilating pupils
glazing over
your heart beating
loud like a drum
thoughts a
hundred miles an hour
in your mind
thinking God
what has she done
i apologise in advance
i’ve no idea how
to warn you
it’s funny
how i dreamed this
would happen
but never did
i think it would
actually be true
what do i do?
corners are cornerous
places to escape
without being
seen to struggle
you of all people
should know
it’s 22 catch-point
red pill or blue
black or white
labrynth of
a lost maze
blind to the dark
grey doesn’t
matter though
i was trapped
and i had no
right angle
left to go
January 17, 2010 at 00:26 · Filed under 6/ Black Sunset (2010) and tagged: butterfly, feeling, happiness, hope, life, loneliness, love, poetry, sadness, thought, writing
i remember,
i know, how you smell
just inside of your neck
on your chest, your jaw
i close my eyes and
drown in your fragrance
i remember,
i know how your stubble
feels sexy, rough, prickly
against my skin
and how your breathing
relaxes, when you’re
in my arms
i remember,
i know how your eyelashes
brush against my cheeks
your face lights up
when you smile
you close your eyes
i remember,
i know when i’m kissing
your abs, veins raise up
on your arms
biceps feel tort
when you’re holding
me down
i remember,
i know how we giggle
and laugh when we playfight
lying in your arms
cuddled tight against
your chest
i remember,
i know if you’re too hot
when you’re sleeping
you rest your hand
on my hand just
so you still stay
touching me
i remember,
i know how we weave
and twist and wind
our legs and feet
around each others
when we are sleeping
i remember,
i know your skin is on fire
and you still hold me
like i’m your
whole world
i miss your everything
i wish you were here
January 17, 2010 at 00:11 · Filed under 6/ Black Sunset (2010) and tagged: anger, feeling, happiness, hurt, life, love, poetry, soul destroying, thought, writing
Remembering how we
first started dating
you got out the car
and said,
let’s see how short you really are
And you hugged me
i kissed you goodbye
through your window
and said,
i’ve not done that before
And you couldn’t believe
it was me and you
after waiting so long
and said,
i’ll see you tomorrow
And we spoke through
midnight ’til dawn
sleepy and separated
and said,
blow me a kiss via phone
And how we lay
in the passenger seat
with the starred sky
and said,
i can relax in your arms
So much happiness
but when you’re not
with me i’m broken
and said,
however long you want to punish me for
i will wait
January 16, 2010 at 23:04 · Filed under 7/ Diary of a Luna.............tic and tagged: butterfly, doubt, feeling, freedom, happiness, hope, insanity, love, lunatic, poetry, thought, writing
the butterflies are stemming
from my boyfriend
i’ll send you some lickerish
strings in replacement
trying not to cry, stranger
since twentyone moons,
how about you sail away
with me to the land of
butterflies and ice-cream
hearts do not break
sky sparkles like
golden glitter
diamond dust
the boat is anticipating
our arrival my darling
will you save me if i drown?
the waters
are calm and tranquil
is the ocean turquoise?
crystal clear alike
the whitest sand
glitter sand?
if you want glitter sand you can have glitter sand
smiling
January 16, 2010 at 22:22 · Filed under 6/ Black Sunset (2010) and tagged: confused, doubt, feeling, freedom, grief, happiness, hope, hurt, life, loneliness, love, pain, poetry, sadness, soul destroying, thought, uncertainty, writing
Stay with her
don’t be
confused
you will always
choose
her
you never
belonged to
me
not really
you were
just a dream
i couldn’t catch
but i will
keep you
in my heart
forever
i hope by
not being
around
the pressure
lifts from
your life
and i hope
you keep
happy
i’m always
going to
love you
January 16, 2010 at 21:31 · Filed under 6/ Black Sunset (2010) and tagged: confused, doubt, feeling, grief, hurt, insanity, life, loneliness, love, pain, poetry, reality, sadness, soul destroying, thought, uncertainty, unlove, writing
if it was
impossible
why do i
painstakingly
gather up
the dust
of my once
glittering
soul from
the earth
upon which
you tread
as you
crush
each
shard
of
every
splinter
of
my broken heart
under your feet
and i
disappear
suffocating
into
nothingness
January 9, 2010 at 20:07 · Filed under 7/ Diary of a Luna.............tic and tagged: depression, feeling, insanity, loneliness, lost, lunatic, madness, pain, poetry, reality, sadness, thought, uncertainty, unlove
The minutes trickle by
Slower than the
Creation of a spider’s web
Words cloud my mind
And leave through the ether
Of plasma
Permanently blackened
Pixellations
For the random reader
The loneliness surrounds me
Not even a voice
Through cell phone or SMS
I am just me by myself
Powerless
My life is
Pathetic
January 9, 2010 at 00:27 · Filed under 7/ Diary of a Luna.............tic and tagged: confused, depression, doubt, feeling, hurt, insanity, life, loneliness, lunatic, madness, pain, poetry, reality, sadness, thought, uncertainty, writing
I sleep to escape
My life
I don’t want to live
Reality
It bites
I sleep to dream
Even
Nightmares
Bring more
Comfort
Than the
Broken glass
Fragments
Of reality
That stab
My veins
Threatening
To pierce
The vessels
Beneath my
Delicately
Tensile
Skin
I sleep to breathe
Imagination
Brings
Peace of
Mind
Blank
And free
Of the
Daily
Tiring
Emotions
That creep
Up on me
And all at once
Constrict
Me in a
Strait jacket
I sleep to stop
My aching head
From the reality
I want that
Eludes me.
January 9, 2010 at 00:15 · Filed under 6/ Black Sunset (2010) and tagged: angel, blessing, confused, depression, doubt, feeling, hurt, life, loneliness, love, pain, poetry, sadness, suicide, thought, uncertainty, unlove, writing
Unsettled. Fragile. Broken.
Fewer words never spoken
Sum up me, myself, I.
Keep your love
If you’re just going to break my heart
Why show me the stars in your eyes
And the moon in your arms
If you’re just going to
Abandon me
No. Self. Esteem.
Feelings of shameful distaste
Reflection in the mirror.
Blurred vision
Heavy sighs at the realisation
Everything is still the same
Except that you can breathe
Now without me
Whilst I suffocate.
Embarrassment. Discomfort.
You’re so much better
Than me.
Sleepy dreams
Bring happiness and peace
Morning reminds me
Of the dark places ahead
You held my hand
And led me into the sun.
You made me
And now I am
Undone.
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