unwords, unthoughts, unreason, unrhyme & unpoetry
caterpillars, cocoons & butterfliesArchive for confused
Arrival / Departure
Your eyes and voice
Promised me a world
Of hope and dreams.
Finally, I thought you
Were here. That I’d arrived.
Mutual understanding.
In my head
You’re smiling at me.
I hate you.
Your flowers smell of death,
Aftershave hides her perfume.
Your voice is encapsulated
In a private joke
Of which I have no part.
I do not require excuses
Justification is certainly
Not permitted
As an exit strategy.
You can’t keep me up
All hours of the night,
Yet here I am.
Waiting.
I’m a joke.
The importance of company
Prioritisation
I am not prioritised
Who am I after all?
What’s in a grand gesture,
In your words of feigned love
When all that I asked was
Your time?
Hide and Seek
Butterflies in my chest
And my heart,
Not palpitations.
A connection,
Distances apart.
You make me smile,
In the same breath
You kill my dreams,
Relegating my life
To make-believe.
Impatient waiting
Games, you play
Me for a fool,
Like a child lost
In a maze.
Ten minutes,
Twenty minutes,
Half an hour.
An hour.
It’s not even funny.
You’d be there
In a millisecond
If I was going to
Make you some
Money.
Truesay
You tell the truth
If it breaks my heart,
Watching me curl away
And die.
You tell the truth
So I know your world.
You tell the truth
So no-one else
Can hurt me, because
I’ve already heard.
You tell the truth
But you are in disguise.
You tell the truth,
Hiding your love
Behind those stars
In your eyes.
You tell the truth
Disappearing for
Days on end.
You tell the truth
Your hand
In my hand.
You tell the truth
Bringing me life
Past midnight.
You tell the truth
I love the sound
Of your voice.
You tell the truth
I am so in love
Wth you.
You tell the truth,
Even when
You lie.
Acupuncture
Scribbled post it notes
Under the eyes
Of the unwatching,
Inaccessible digits,
Disdained expressions,
Hopelessness in your voice,
Smiling through pain.
Your words calm me,
Pierce my brain
Like needles,
Tempted to believe
In your essence.
Nocternal phonecalls
Under the ears
Of the unhearing.
Craving his closeness
And grinning face
In the light
Of his eyes
Before me.
He tells me secrets
About you and that
You were perpetuating
Yet another lie.
Anguish accumulates
You are not
Worth these tears
I cry.
You are not
Worth these tears
I cry.
Hung up, Cut off
You breathe all too suddenly,
Playing under covers.
Smiling.
Dead letter day, ten days too late
She will return to you,
Lost in fate.
Distorted innocence, waiting
For the misconception,
Of perfection.
You are missing in the rain
Bear with me, words
In the wind.
Point of No Return
To the point of no return
I invest myself in you
Will the reward be just
Enough for both us two?
Minds and beliefs
Separated, segregated
Can’t they combine?
Nothing has even happened
Blind leading the blind.
Offering me chocolate caramel
You kill me with sweet
And sour words
All I want is happiness
Don’t I deserve some kind?
Dream after dream
A sliced peace of mind.
Brown white speckles
Dimples and freckles
Your tapered needs
Hold more importance
Than the peace of my sleep.
Note 19
My eyes are tired
Not through crying
But from a migraine
That hurts my brain
You keep me up
Because you are out
I sleep disconnected
Until you tell me
You are safe.
I have a tendency to get caught up and lost in the world, still trying to discover what my gift is and how to use it. I write either when I'm deliriously happy (right now it's magic and butterflies though that is changing on a daily basis) or depressingly upset, so it's one extreme or the other, never a happy balance or medium. I love imagery and try and capture what I see in my mind's eye but sometimes I just don't have the words...I hope you enjoy reading, please tell me what you think!
